First off, Happy Friday to everyone!
Here in the East coast, it's quitting time or close to it, if you work a normal schedule.
I was actually having a frustrating day at first, and felt I accomplished little until after 12 noon.
Luckily for me, I was done before 3 and headed home. I stopped at the local store first, because I had an urge to buy some beer and look at the wines they had.
I'm not a huge wine drinker , but I do enjoy it now and then. I discovered a nice smooth sweet wine several months ago at the store. I've had it several times and really love it!
It's called Stella Rosa- Black..
I'm not sure if its available everywhere, but I've found it at Target and Shoppers Food Warehouse where I go often. If you are the type that isnt too keen on wines, never fear! It tastes very good and everyone I have shared it with loves it too!
Anyhoo, I went to Target.....Sadly, they were out of it again. It seems to sell very well, so I bought some beer instead :)
I have fallen into a pattern at Target because when you walk straight in, womens clothes are on the right, and womens lingerie is on the left.
Naturally, Im drawn to both sides of the isle. There's always sales and clearence on the right. Several months ago the stores near here added a new line of really cute bras and panties. Im not sure if its the same where you live, but most stores here seem to be set up the same.
So then I take a left down the isle and quickly look for a new book or a good cheap movie I havent seen .. Housewares, food , and then to the sweet girly things....Body lotion, pretty soaps and shaving things, and makeup. Then it's to the register or out the door if I haven't bought anything.
This is my typical pattern at Target.
I guess I rambled a bit, but it occurred to me that I exhibit the behavior of any typical middle aged woman at that store or any other that Im comfortable in.
Why do we feel the way we do?
Do we grow up to feel "girly" without ANY outside influence...OR is our behavior a learned behavior?
I feel mine was both. I have always felt different, but the internet played a part.
Let's face it. most of us were facinated ( at least in the beginning) with all the internet has to offer, and some of us, like ME still are!... I love blogs!
Shopping for clothes, makeup, breast forms , wigs, ect. is easily done from the comfort of your home online. Trans and crossdressing forums are availible to share our troubles, experiences, and thoughts online and anonymously. We can actally be ourselves without fear of being outled.
My experience as I mentioned, took part long before the internet. Having sex with a cute neighborhood boy and wearing panties was the start of it for me.
It's what I would call falling into the "rabbits hole" for me, because once I had my first cock, I was hooked. I still liked women, and I still do, but I always had a deep yearning to be seen as a pretty and desirable woman to a man who would accept me for who I am.
I've had my share of jerks and unfortunatley many show their true selves in the bedroom but I weed my dates out before meeting for the most part.
Being talked to, and treated as a sweet bitch by a real gentleman is something I love. Meeting a man, talking, getting close , and him kissing me makes me feel ALIVE.
My usual response, if we have been making out for a bit, is to continue kissing him and stroke his cock through his pants.
I'm careful about this at first, because I want to guage his reaction. If not much is happening ,I let him continue to kiss me. If he gets hard, I will continue the tease until he gets so heated up that I undo his pants and give him a blow job . However my ultimate goal with a guy at that point, is to get him into bed to fuck my sweet bottom.
Being desired by a man as a woman makes me feel feel wanted, lusted after, and beautiful.
I get nervous talking to a man on the phone, but I give them my phone number if they seem like a good catch. This proves they are at least half way serious about meeting a girl, and I find that you save a lot of time offering to talk and meet. ...If the guy is someone you are actually interested in , give him a chance to open up and tell him about yourself. Spend time taking a good picture and DON'T come on too strong...Let him persue YOU!
Maybe you are a casual crossdresser and have never had a man, and maybe you only desire women. Maybe you have a wife or girlfriend, and thats just fine. If so, its probably easier not as complicated.
For me, I hate being bisexual. I like men slightly more, but it's confusing. I want a relationship with either, but entering into a realtionship with a woman again, I would have to be honest about my past and I adore men too much to give them completely up.